The first prompt of the year is:
… finally we can make a start…
You must use the prompt as it is written and only use 100 words making 106 altogether.
Good Luck!
ESCOMB YEAR 5 CLASS BLOG |
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Welcome to the Year 5 blog. Each week we will be completing 100 word challenges in order to improve our writing. Please look back through previous challenges from last year to understand what is expected from you.
The first prompt of the year is: … finally we can make a start… You must use the prompt as it is written and only use 100 words making 106 altogether. Good Luck!
50 Comments
Ruby A
4/9/2015 07:18:14 am
This is a test to see that this works.
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Lucy.B
6/9/2015 09:17:34 am
A week or two ago, Lilly was having fun with her best friends, Kate, Ella and Holly. Kate is the oldest then Ella the second oldest Holly third and finally Lilly is the youngest. They all live in Marigold Lane. Lilly however lives in White Street but comes to visit her nana. They had all arranged to meet together at Kate's house for something important. Lilly, Holly and Kate were waiting impatiently for Ella to arrive. Kate was walking back and fourth continuously. 15 minutes later, Ella arrived "finally we can make a start!"
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:05:11 pm
A lovely start Lucy. This is a well written piece. I like how you have included speech and have used a comma to denote a clause, I would like to see you use a wider range of punctuation next time, such as an ellipsis.
kate
4/9/2015 11:35:16 am
"Finally we can make a start." I, Kate new class 5 member can make a start with the rest of my class!!We can make a start on, doing online home work each week for the year, such as, this,our very own class blog and completing big writes sometimes once a week also doing "thunks" every Thursday what Mr Turner calls when you debate about questions in group, on Thursday our first "thunk" question was, What colour is Tuesday? I debated, the colour Tuesday is, multi-coloured because any-thing could happen on a Tuesday!! Anyway, me and my class use the
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:07:21 pm
Well done Kate. You have completed your first 100 word challenge. I like the use of adverbs within your writing. Try to focus on your full stops in order to break up long sentences.
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Lucy E
4/9/2015 11:51:53 am
one sunny day a girl named Millie wanted to go to the beach she sloped out of bed and tip-toed into her mum and dads room "can we go to the beach?" she said as she was crossing her fingers for a yes and as you know they did, jumping up and down Millie shouted "okay finally we can make a start getting packed!" and off they went to the beach... at the beach. Running across the beach to the sea Millie screamed in joyful happiness.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:08:09 pm
A good effort Lucy. You have used a range of punctuation, Don't forget capital letters.
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daniel
5/9/2015 01:21:50 am
Once there was a dinosaur called Bingo, he lived with his mam and dad. He had a light green body and head ,glistening white teeth and has a jolly personality. One day his parents said " you are old enough and tough enough to buy your own cave ". Bingo took his parents advice and the following week he found a cave. He gathered his things and moved in. Firstly, he started to paint the walls bright blue then he unpacked his suitcase. Bingo's Mam and Dad helped him settle in. As they left the cave they said " finally we can make a start".......... to be continued soon.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:10:41 pm
An interesting piece of writing Daniel. I like how you have included speech marks and time connectives. Remember that an ellipsis should only have three dots...
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Thomas
5/9/2015 01:52:32 am
On Friday after school we went on holiday to Buxton in Derbyshire when we reached the little log cabin . We opened the cabin door with excitement. Finally we could make a start on packing our suitecases. After that we darted down to the swimming pool I was the first one in!we all did a couple of lengths my Mam and Dad did ninety three lengths or more. My Grandma and I only did a couple off lengths!soon after we went for a delicious and lovely meal at the mucky pub!it was absolutely divine later that evening we went to bed THE END.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:12:22 pm
A good effort Thomas. I love the use of the word 'divine'. Try to focus on the use of the comma next time.
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Thomas
5/9/2015 02:36:38 am
On Friday after school we went on holiday, 2:30 hours later we arrived at Buxton in Derbyshire. We reached the log cabin, we opened the door with excitement finally we can make a start on unpacking our suitcases. Soon after we darted down to the swimming pool, I was the first one in the pool, my Mam and Dad did 93 lengths or more my Grandma and I only did a couple. After that we went for a delicious lovely meal. I then went on the arcade a bit and I spent a few pounds. Later that evening we relaxed and then we all dozed off to bed THE END.
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Ethan s
5/9/2015 02:58:12 am
On my holiday in Cornwall we decided to book a fishing trip for two hours, after talking to the fisherman about the booking we decided that we would do it at 2 o’clock, not realising that the weather forecast was to rain at 2 o’ clock! So there we were stood on the harbour wall ready to hop on the boat, finally it arrived and we jumped on, after about 5 minutes sat at the front of the boat we were at the destination so we stopped “Finally we can make a start” we all cast our rods, I pulled mine up first - a FISH!
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:14:27 pm
Good work Ethan. I particularly liked the end statement with the inclusion of a hyphen.
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Amelia
6/9/2015 04:06:00 am
It was the summer holidays and one day we decided to go for a lovely picnic to Hamsterley forest.Unfortunately when we arrived we realised that we had forgotten the food so we set off back home in the car.But there was a traffic-jam ahead, when we were back home my mam couldn't find her keys. After a while, she finally found the lost keys. Once we were there we looked for a place to park the car but it took forever, because it was a Saturday and as usual it was very busy. Just as we were getting out , l couldn't believe my eyes. There was a huge black cloud overhead which exploded above us so we rushed back into the car! " When will we have our picnic? " yelled Amelia. After five minutes the sun was back out Mam said, " Finally we can make a start! ".
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:15:48 pm
This is a good attempt Amelia. You gave included a range of time connectives and commas to denote a clause.
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ruby a
6/9/2015 08:35:00 am
TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY IN YEAR 5 I REALLY THINK I WILL ENJOY THIS YEAR MR TURNER IS KIND AND CARING HE IS VERY EXPERIENCED ON APPLE IPADS I AM EXCITED TO SEE MY FRIENDS SUCH AS GRACE, AMELIA AND EMILY AND I CANT WAIT TO TELL THEM ABOUT MY SIX WEEKS ITS BED TIME ONLY A FEW HOURS UNTILSCHOOL OK ITS THE MORNIG TIME FOR YUMMY BACON AND SCHOOL IM GOING TO HAVE THE BEST DAY EVER SO I RAN UP THE STAIRS AND PULLED MY NEW SCHOOL UNIFOM ON I RAN TO THE CAR AND FINALLY WE CAN MAKE A START.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:17:51 pm
A good effort Ruby. You have written a lovely piece, Don't forget to include full stops and check your Caps Lock is not on.
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Emma
6/9/2015 09:00:16 am
I have a rabbit. The day I got it I was beaming with excitement. As we drove the little happy bunny home, I carefully opened the holy box and then jump! The little bunny had jumped out of the box. I quickly lifted him back into the box. Once we arrived home I played with it. Because it has caramel coloured patches I called it Twix. Five weeks later my mam said that my dog sammy played with the rabbit. I was so happy that they were getting along, so maybe now that has happened finally we can make a start to Twix's and Sammy's Friendship.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:19:04 pm
Good work Emma! I love the use of short and complex sentences. This story really does begin to flow.
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Tilly R
6/9/2015 12:45:17 pm
One morning I went to see my best friend Liv, and she had broken her knee, so she had crutches. I asked for a go, but she said no, so five minutes later I asked if we can play a game with them but she said no. Ten minutes later I asked again and she shouted YES, I said finally we can make a start, so I started playing with them but I fell off them and hurt my leg really bad. I went to the doctors and he said that I had broken it so I had an X-ray to see if it was broken.
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Mr Turner
7/9/2015 06:37:02 am
Well done Tilly! This is a lovely start to your 100 word challenge. I am really pleased to see that you are experimenting with the comma and using it within your writing. Think about other punctuation that you could use to 'hook' the reader.
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Lucy.B
7/9/2015 08:02:30 am
A week or two ago, Lilly was having fun with her best friends, Kate, Ella and Holly. Kate is the oldest then Ella the second oldest Holly third and finally Lilly is the youngest. They all live in Marigold Lane. Lilly however lives in White Street but comes to visit her nana. They had all arranged to meet together at Kate's house for something important. Lilly, Holly and Kate were waiting impatiently for Ella to arrive. Kate was walking back and fourth continuously. Ten minutes later, Ella arrived "finally we can make a start!"
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:22:19 am
Well done Lucy. This is a good start. You have used a range of openers to draw the reader in. You have also shown good use of the comma within your writing.
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Grace
7/9/2015 08:23:02 am
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:21:09 pm
A good attempt at your first challenge. You have included speech marks. Don't forget to add a question mark where necessary.
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:24:21 am
Well done Grace. You have made a good start to the 100 word challenge including speech and using a comma. What punctuation would you use at the point where you ask the reader about your owner at the end?
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Kelsi
7/9/2015 10:47:21 am
Finally we can make a start on a new school year, I moved into year 5 and have a new teacher his name is Mr Turner.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:22:33 pm
A lovely, honest piece of writing Kelsi. This is well written.
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Casper
8/9/2015 08:31:01 am
Finally we can make a start......Thursday 3rd September 2015 my first day in year 5. Mr Turner was waitting for us in the class room when we entered we took our seats. we used the iPads to learn about coding. But when we first entered we learned about maths. After lunch Mr Turner told us about this blog. He said ''every week I will set a 100 word challenge sometimes with a prompt." This is my first try on this blog I like it but i think it is hard to type 100 words. I do think i will enjoy Mr Turner's year 5 class.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:24:06 pm
Well done Casper! I like that you have included speech marks and based your challenge on real events. I hope you do enjoy this year.
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liam w
8/9/2015 10:18:07 am
One day my dad and i thought about going camping, my dad hired an RV we packed our suit cases and set off. It took about five hours my dad set up the tent but we forgot the pegs so we walked to the camping shop and bought pegs for the tent while i carried the pegs to the campsite when it reached dark my dad fetched some firewood we found two stones and rubbed them together and we made fire! my dad said finally we can make a start.The next day we woke up early there was a pond we could swim in eleven hours later we jogged back to the campsite and we told ghost story's two hours later we fell asleep.The next day we only had until 12 noon so we had a bite and set of to go home six hours later we reached our destination.
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Mr Turner
10/9/2015 11:25:16 pm
A good effort Liam. You have included your challenge words within your writing. Don't forget that 'I' needs a capital letter.
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Emily
8/9/2015 12:11:33 pm
The day started by my dad, mum and I walking to the local park!
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Mr Turner
11/9/2015 05:30:26 am
A good effort Emily! You have included your challenge words within your writing. As discussed this week, could you write in a paragraph and not in several statements.
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Alicia
9/9/2015 11:35:34 am
On the morning of the 8th September 2015 I woke up very early at 6o'clock, as I was so excited, it was my 10th birthday. I had been waiting for this day because I had asked for an American Girl Doll but didn't know if I would get it or not. When I rang downstairs and saw the pile of wrapped presents I thought to myself "finally we can make a start" as I started to tear off the wrapping paper. The very last box was my doll and I was so happy.
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:25:00 am
A good start Alicia. This is an interesting story.
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deyla
9/9/2015 12:41:20 pm
"Finally we can make a start did you have to take that long packing?," complained Beth, my older sister as we trudged towards the car. "Sorry," I muttered under my breath not meaning it. The car engine roared, we set off, I sighed, I hadn't packed any toys at all and we were going away for a fortnight! Eventually we reached the docks we were going to France...BORING. We all boarded the boat and it chugged off. About an hour later the boat arrived in France. Clambering back into the car I grunted. I knew we were about to set off to our super old, boring, private French villa.
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:25:20 am
Good work Deyla. You have used a wide range of punctuation here.
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ruby o
10/9/2015 08:00:52 am
Finally we can make a start to the new football season and reach our victory. We all jumped into the car and picked up our midfield player jessica i play as a striker and my sister plays in defence.we arrived at peter lee at 11-00 am we kicked of at 11-30 am. our first game was against Newton Aycliffe it was 1-1 .Our second game was against Ieam Rangers and we won 3-0 I scored the first goal in the top left hand corner. After the game we shook hands with the other players we were all very happy we won. COME ON YOU BAGGIES!!!!!!
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:26:22 am
An interesting story Ruby! You have written in chronological order. Don't forget that places need capital letters.
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michael
10/9/2015 08:58:02 am
Dinosaur Discovery.
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:27:31 am
An interesting story Michael! If only it was true!
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MICHAEL
19/9/2015 07:38:28 am
IF ONLY IT WAS TRUE
Scarlet
11/9/2015 12:08:22 am
Sam went to the sweetshop and brought home a special sweet. His mom and dad said "Sam,finally we can make a start on your homework."" Can you give me a minute please?" Sam replied. So Sam went away and ate the sweet that he did not know it was special and magical. He ate it and he grew,he grew and he grew. He was as tall as the house. So he travel to a witches hut and got a potion to bring him back to his normal size. He ran home and drank the potion. Shrunk and shrunk.He was back to his normal size
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:28:53 am
Well done Scarlet. You have completed your first 100 word challenge including speech marks. What other punctuation could we have used when Sam began to grow bigger... and bigger?
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Connor
13/9/2015 06:55:49 am
At weekend I went to stay at my grannies house with my brother Lewis , I packed my ORANGE pjs and my CROCODILE slippers. We ordered a takeaway for our tea which was pizza with PEPPERS , chicken and extra olives. The pizza was yummy and we ate all of our tea, then it was time for bed. We got washed and put our pjs on then went to bed which was a very SOFT bed. The next day we went for a walk with my dog Meg, who is a little black fluffy terrier with a ginger beard and I FORGO
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Connor
13/9/2015 07:29:53 am
At the weekend I went to stay at my grannies house with my brother Lewis, I packed my ORANGE pjs and my CROCODILE slippers. We ordered a take away for our tea which was pizza with PEPPERS , chicken and extra olives. The pizza was yummy and we ate all of our tea, then it was time for bed. We got washed and put our pjs on and we went to bed which was a very SOFT bed. The next morning we went for a walk with my dog meg who is a little black fluffy terrier with a ginger beard and I FORGOT the leader and had to go home again.
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Mr Turner
16/9/2015 10:29:32 am
Well done Connor. You have completed your second 100 word challenge. Remember to place this in the reply box below that particular challenge.
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Ethan W
30/9/2015 08:26:19 am
One freezing cold morning me, my dad and our 5 dogs went on a walk in the horses field with my new orange boomerang but I really wanted a new one that came back to you my dad said"he'd ordered one already" I didn't believe him though although he had next day it had arrived I was so happy finally I could make a start so this time we went to the beach because it was October and the is the only month dogs can go to the beach. I couldn't wait at all my dad was also exited my mum was just here to walk the dogs94 me and my dad were that exited my mum pulled over ohoh.
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